I Do Know Why I Wrote “Idunno”
What you see here is the cover of kids’ book #15 for me, and this one’s a little bit different. Somewhere in the past two years, while I was working on books #13 and #14, I had a bit of an epiphany:
Grown-ups are terrified to admit they don’t know.
The kids I write for, and the ones who show up at community events or take workshops with me, they’re cool with not having it all figured out. Children dwell in grey areas. One might say they actually revel in them. A wee person can take on life’s biggest, most uncomfortable questions, be utterly clueless about them, and still see their ignorance as an opportunity to learn and discover, as opposed to a shortcoming or a character flaw.
But big people, not so much. In many cases, not at all.
It’s not like I hadn’t seen this fear in adults before the pandemic, but there’s something about a major global crisis that tends to shine a spotlight on all the things we’ve been trying to tuck into a dark corner. If there’s a clear takeaway from the past two years, it’s that we don’t have the answers we thought we did. We don’t even have most of the questions. And, cruel irony, just when we could benefit from a fresh start and a radical rebuild of our world view, many of us really aren’t in a place where we can own up to not knowing. Some of us check out when we realize that we don’t know, and throw ourselves into what’s left of the “old normal”. Others go so far as to sharpen pitchforks and light torches to go after anyone who points out gaps in our understanding, who asks us to rethink something (or think about it for the first time).
So when it came time to work on this year’s project, I decided to write a kids’ book…for adults. With the help of a very talented (and understanding) illustrator, I put together “Idunno”. The main character, a sweet, purple monster, is undoubtedly cute, but they’re also a gentle reminder that it’s fine if we don’t know. It’s better than fine. Not knowing, and being open about it, seeking others who are also a little bit in the dark, isn’t the end of our reputation, our pride, or our sense of self-worth. It’s the beginning of an adventure, and maybe even a way to heal.
Admitting we don’t know is hard work for adults. I make my living finding out what I don’t know, and it’s taken me most of my adult life to get comfortable with it. There are definitely off-days.
I hope, if you find yourself with a copy of this new book on your lap, that you share it with one of those kid-type humans. I hope it makes you both giggle, and that you have a cool chat afterwards. I also hope that you read it to yourself once or twice, without the kid around, and that it brings you just a tiny bit of comfort and reassurance. I hope it makes it just a little easier, if only for a minute or two, to confess “Idunno”.